Delusions of Grandeur


Posted on: October 28, 2003

I was cleaning out our bookshelves the other day, which have become increasingly overstuffed, and came across a small green paper back titled “Gleebs 2.” Neither of us have any clue from whence it came, but it has some rather funny little conversation excerpts and random quotes in it. I’ve been looking through it and have decided that they would make great random journal entries, so look forward to gleebs scattered throughout my random daily updates…..I figured it would help relieve the boredom of listening to my selfish dribble about the useless nature of existence in general.

Seth thinks the cause of the stomach pains is the massive amount of sunflower seeds I’ve recently consumed. I don’t know how this is possible, but he ate a bunch tonight and found himself with the same sort of pain I’ve described…although his was very short-lived. I can’t believe it’s still hurting. Speaking of stomachs….

(paragraph space randomly inserted here to insure that I reach my quota of paragraph space insertions for the day 🙂 )

I saw the pictures from Friday’s anniversary party for our clinic….I have never looked so fat in my entire life….seriously. I don’t think even my baby pictures looked this chunky. My ARMS even looked fat and I have the most ridiculous chicken arms ever seen on a human on this planet. After seeing those pictures I became seriously scared, not just my usual lazy sort of worried about my weight. I have now made a firm resolution to loose said weight by thanksgiving…..I would make the goal date my trip to texas, but since that happens in a week I figured that was a bit unreasonable….although I hope I’ll loose at least a few pounds by then.

I’m still not sure how I’m going to accomplish this weight loss, having never seriously dieted or exercised in my entire life….I’m going to try to ride my bike every night on the gear that offers the most resistance, and try to eat my meals earlier in the day…..instead of eating no breakfast and eating such a heavy dinner. The problem is that I always feel hungry all day when I eat breakfast. I’ve been doing some reading though and I think this is because I tend to eat carbohydrate heavy breakfasts, which wear off relatively quick, instead of protein, which takes a bit longer to process….thus making you feel full for a bit longer. The other problem is that I have a desk job which is definitely less active than waiting tables so that’s led to part of the weight gain, along with the fact that I’m often bored and have the bad habit of snacking when I’m bored. Blah…’s ridiculous to feel this annoyed about it. I could care less how other people look, and I probably weigh about the the same as several other people who I wouldn’t judge as remotely chunky…why is it we’re so much harder on ourselves? Why is it I can recognize the fact that I’m being harder on myself than my standards for other people, and at the same time have a huge part of myself feel as if the part that recognizes the unreasonable expectation is just making excuses? Why?!?

With all that self-involved whining in mind, today’s gleeb from page 54 of the nifty gleeb book (what a GREAT WORD!! Gleeb, he he.)

Say something wise.
“Love someone.”
Say something wiser.
“Love yourself.”

edited to change the mood icon that annoyed me for some unknown reason…how pathetic is that?


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